Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Years ago I was touring with Dr. Odell Hobbs, and the Virginia Union University Tennessee Tennessee
I thought about that incident as I reflected on all the talk I've heard over the last few months referencing the Obama family and the wholesome picture of black families they reveal to the world. During that time I've also heard a number of references to the fictional family, the Huxtables from back in the '80s. After hearing enough of these references I like Dr. Hobbs became annoyed. 
I'm not blind to the harsh realities of the world we live in regarding the makeup of American Households, I was raised by a single strong woman, but I'm also not blind to the positive realities of American households.
Before the Huxtables made Thursday night "must see TV", the Beasleys; my aunt and uncle, were successfully raising three children in Paterson New Jersey
Even as I browse the blogosphere, I see numerous examples of black families making marriage work. When you get a chance, visit Donovan McNabb's mom or, read about Keith's night out bowling with his wife and a bunch of other married couples. If bowling isn't your thing then read about his trip to the movies with 75 other couples. Please pay a visit to Tammy to read about her Funny Valentine. And, before you sign off say a prayer for our sister Lisa Shaw who's been fighting illness lately but still managed to start Marriage Flavor.
While I admire all of these examples, I also admire those of you that have suffered through the pain of divorce, the trauma of abuse, or the salted wound of infidelity, but have somehow managed to keep your sanity and your integrity intact. I mean, I like the Huxtables, but you've overcome a whole lot more with a whole lot less.
DEDICATED TO SHAZ AND HER SOULMATE
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People are so fixated on what was such a popular but fictional show where in real life, neither Clair or Cliff held it down. Bill had an affair and reasons unknown to us, Philicia got a divorce.
ReplyDeleteI'd much rather focus on the real-life struggles of those who are doing the very best they can with little to no road map or script for that matter. Most Americans want a happy, loving & successful relationship and happy and successful children following close behind. I'd much rather have a role model living next door, in my immediate family, at church or other places that I might frequent so that I can see the real life struggles, how they've over come them and how if we all pitch in, we can have one less divorce, one less abused person and one less statistic of any kind. I'm all for reruns of the Huxtables, but I'd rather have lunch with you and the Mrs, Tammy and the Mr and Shaz and the Mr so that I can get some tips for my next "Wedding on the beach" (smile)
Love you!
Free Spirit you hit the nail on the head, and great reminders about their real life issues. I think all of these couples have gotten on each others nerves at some point and had to learn how to heal and forgive.
ReplyDeleteSo what's the name of that restaurant we're meeting Tammy at in New York? Maybe we can hit Philly on the way back, if Keith will lead us to the best Cheese Steaks in town.
See ya soon.
SLC
That was a great post. You are absolutely right. Some have slipped these "insults" in disguised as compliments and many of us (including myself) allowed them to fly right by us just happy to have a Black American first family. The Obamas have accomplished a lot but they aren't the first. Thanks for helping us to put things in perspective.
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
Shanita
Thanks for the shout out and such a positive post about sucessful marriages and family life. It's a shame that even amomgst our own people there doesn't seem to be too many examples of marriages and family life that is positive, but all one has to do is look and you will see several examples of it all over our community. This was a
ReplyDeletegreat post.
Great post! You have just given hubby and I some great examples to follow on our life long road of marriage.
ReplyDeleteButterfly - We're going to need more then lunch to go over the fab ideas I have for your beach wedding (smile)
Thanks for dedicating this post to Jeff and I.